Wednesday, December 21, 2011

I'm not okay right now. but I'm going to be okay. I can promise you that.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

I think I just really need my mom right now. like I really do. I know she would make more sense of all of this than I currently am.

Saturday, December 17, 2011

I think I'll always love driving around its like this quick escape. I always take the same way with the same music. Its always one song. put on repeat. and thats the way I like it. I feel like thats just how I work out lifes problems. I cry. I laugh. I smile. its not always sad. but I guess most of the time it is.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

its been awhile.

Its crazy how much you can miss something, when its still right there in front of you.
I promise things will change and they will get better.
I hope you're still happy.
I couldn't tell you the first thing thats going on with me right now. couldn't tell you for the life of me. but it literally might be makin me crazy.
When one thing falls apart. I guess everything goes right on with it.
Schools over and I couldn't be happier. can't wait to start fresh.
I can't wait for the new year.
I can't wait for Christmas.
I hope someday someone will love a girl like me.
You know as much as I feel like we've moved on and things have changed and gotten better. I still can't seem to forgive you. I still can't seem to forget those drunken nights. the names you called me. the nights you made me feel worthless. told me I was worthless. those things I don't think people forget. the night I watched you fall down the hallway trying to make it to your bed. those nights I'll never forget. ever.
Maybe its not about making others proud as much as it is making myself proud of the girl I am.
Thank you for driving around with me on nights that I'm upset. things like that make me happier than you know.
I''m going to mess up. I'm going to say things I don't mean.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

I've been a complete emotional wreck these past few days.